FlashMob! Bios: Collin | Joe | Laura | Jeff | Grant


Bassist, contortionist, and alphabetition L-Van was born and raised near the Great Salt Lake, which is primarily why her list of crimes is so long. Charges include:

1. Improper ventilation and licensure of a broccoli farm (Zech. 13:4)
2. Wearing of brazier without pastoral inspection / approval (Lev. 15: 8-9)
3. Ingestion of low fiber breads and similar starches past sundown (Duet. 6: 34-39)
4. Purchase and wear of garments similar / equal to garments owned by a "frienemy" (Lev. 28: 45-45.5)
5. Failure to make sacrifice of a sanctioned ungulate upon successful rendition of [any] Les Claypool song (Les. 3:1)

Laura has mixed feelings about her inevitable capture and delivery to justice: "Hey there's that whole 'To those who are without sin, cast the first stone' deal right??" Honestly, if caught, Laura's screwed. This is why she will never look you directly in the eye while on stage and maintains a "personal space" radius of no less than 116 inches.

Basses:
» A red bass that rocks
» A red bass that has knobs that rocks less

Noise:
» An amp and a head. They make loud noises.

Effects:
Rumors are true. Laura has a Big Muff.